A practical guide to understanding and managing filler words.
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speaking with clarity
Filler words like “um”, “ah” and “like” are something many of us use when we’re speaking, especially when we feel nervous, put on the spot or need time to think.
They’re not a sign that you’re a poor communicator, and you don’t need to remove every single one. However, becoming more aware of your filler words and learning how to manage them can help you speak with more clarity and confidence.
Here are five steps to help you understand your filler words and develop a more intentional speaking style
1. Notice Your Filler Words
2. Practice Speaking Without Them
3. Introduce Pauses Instead
4. Slow Down
5. Track Your Progress
They’re not a sign that you’re a poor communicator, and you don’t need to remove every single one. However, becoming more aware of your filler words and learning how to manage them can help you speak with more clarity and confidence.
Here are five steps to help you understand your filler words and develop a more intentional speaking style
1. Notice Your Filler Words
2. Practice Speaking Without Them
3. Introduce Pauses Instead
4. Slow Down
5. Track Your Progress
what to do when 'UM's' show up when we speak
The first step is awareness.
Pay attention to when and why you use filler words. Do they appear when you’re nervous? When you’re unsure what to say next? Or have they become part of your everyday speaking style?
One of the best ways to notice your patterns is to record yourself speaking. I know this can feel uncomfortable (especially if speaking already makes you nervous), but it’s one of the quickest ways to understand what’s really happening.
You can also ask a trusted colleague or friend to listen and give you feedback. Sometimes your filler word or phrase might not be something you're even aware of yet!
Pay attention to when and why you use filler words. Do they appear when you’re nervous? When you’re unsure what to say next? Or have they become part of your everyday speaking style?
One of the best ways to notice your patterns is to record yourself speaking. I know this can feel uncomfortable (especially if speaking already makes you nervous), but it’s one of the quickest ways to understand what’s really happening.
You can also ask a trusted colleague or friend to listen and give you feedback. Sometimes your filler word or phrase might not be something you're even aware of yet!
1. notice your filler words
Once you know your common filler words, don’t try to change everything at once.
Start with one or two words you notice yourself using regularly and practise reducing them in everyday conversations - this is the important part! Don't just try to eradicate them in high-pressure situations like presentations or interviews. But start with the day to day conversations and team meetings where you already feel comfortable.
These changes will help you to build awareness in low stakes situations and also help you develop new habits.
Start with one or two words you notice yourself using regularly and practise reducing them in everyday conversations - this is the important part! Don't just try to eradicate them in high-pressure situations like presentations or interviews. But start with the day to day conversations and team meetings where you already feel comfortable.
These changes will help you to build awareness in low stakes situations and also help you develop new habits.
2. practice talking without them
Many filler words appear because we feel uncomfortable with silence.
But pauses are not a problem.
A pause can make you sound more confident. It gives you time to gather your thoughts, allows your audience to process what you’ve said and can help you emphasise important points.
The next time you feel the urge to say “um”, try taking a breath and giving yourself a moment before continuing.
But pauses are not a problem.
A pause can make you sound more confident. It gives you time to gather your thoughts, allows your audience to process what you’ve said and can help you emphasise important points.
The next time you feel the urge to say “um”, try taking a breath and giving yourself a moment before continuing.
3. Introduce pauses instead
When we feel nervous, it’s common to speed up. We want to get through the moment as quickly as possible. And the adrenaline simply makes us speak faster - that's what it's designed to do!
But speaking too quickly can make it harder for your brain and your words to keep up, which can lead to more filler words.
Aim for a pace that feels comfortable for both you and your audience. Speaking more slowly and clearly gives your ideas more impact.
Try:
Then practice leaving some space between your thoughts.
But speaking too quickly can make it harder for your brain and your words to keep up, which can lead to more filler words.
Aim for a pace that feels comfortable for both you and your audience. Speaking more slowly and clearly gives your ideas more impact.
Try:
- Recording yourself and listening back to your pace
- Reading out loud and focusing on speaking clearly
Then practice leaving some space between your thoughts.
4. sLOW DOWN
Changing your speaking habits takes time.
Be patient with yourself and notice the progress you’re making. If you recorded yourself at the start, compare it with a later recording to see what has changed.
And remember using some filler words is completely normal. The goal isn’t to sound robotic or perfectly polished. It’s to feel more comfortable, intentional and in control when you speak.
Be patient with yourself and notice the progress you’re making. If you recorded yourself at the start, compare it with a later recording to see what has changed.
And remember using some filler words is completely normal. The goal isn’t to sound robotic or perfectly polished. It’s to feel more comfortable, intentional and in control when you speak.
